Two years have flown by. So much has happened. I can't say it's gotten easier living without her, but at least at this point I know I can survive. One of the hardest realities that hits you soon after you lose someone is that world doesn't stop. Life must go on. As you drive around soaking in your anger, hurt, frustration and questions you notice something, no one else seems to be too concerned. They sit in their cars talking on their phones, laughing, smiling, enjoying life. And you're just there, existing for the moment.
I really have no room to talk. In ministry I grew way too comfortable at funerals and to this day still really am. I lost people close to me and went on like nothing was wrong and thats what a lot of people expect out of us. But for those of us out there who have lost part of us when someone we loved has passed on, you ask yourself how can the world just keep going on like nothing happened? As you drive around and wonder if you'll ever to laugh like that, we have to remember the world keeps going. Does the warrant anger and frustrations? Maybe... but what's more important in these moments is a healthy remembrance of those who we have lost and those close to us who have lost someone.
Remember the good times, the times you laughed, the times you cried, the precious seconds you had with them not just the fact they aren't here with us. That's the true injustice, simplifying someone's life to the second when we lost them or the a funeral.
All so painfully true. Ive spent alot of time just being sad that she isnt here and thinking about what she is missing. It hasnt been until recently I realized that I dont thank god for all of the time I did have with her. Its not all about that night when we lost her. Its about the memories we made and keeping those alive. It is also about taking this experience and being able to relate to others in the hopes that they dont feel as alone as we did when it happened.
ReplyDeleteps this is gosh